I SAW HIM!

For 9 months I saw him everyday, talked to him 50 times a week and had him on my mind 24 hours a day. It all ended on the 10th of august, and exactly 6 weeks and 5 days later we did not talk, or see each other whatsoever. Until now. 6 weeks and 5 days later, I see him right in front of me while I was driving out of the car park. I was compltely unprepared and shocked as hell! I was with 2 of my friends and the car went silent as we passed him by. We were all stunned, and none of us were ready for what happened. I was so overwhelmed, that I felt like I had to stop and breathe, but I didnt want him to think I was waiting for him, so I kept driving. As soon as my eyes met his, I looked away trying not to hit him with my car, even though it would have been an awesome thing to do (;D). After that, I dont know how he reacted. However, my friend who was sitting next to me told me that he had actually stopped and completely turned his head in the opposite direction. Hmmm??? After she told me, I had some sort of panic attack. I went from a laughing, to a crying, to a screaming fit. I just didnt understand how after going from talking to each other for 9 months, to not even seeing each other for 2 months, how he could turn away like that. I overanalysed the whole thing all night, and woke up feeling rotten and guilty. I actually felt bad for what happened between us.

But it takes someone you confide in - a good friend to remind you. That what mine did -she reminded me why I left him in the begining. Reminded me how bad he was for me, and how I would never ever be happy with him no matter how hard I try. And for once, especially after what I wintnessed the other day, I dont hate him. In fact, I feel badly for him. For his inabilty to grow up. Seriously, Im not being sarcastic, I do believe that he's still a boy that will never change. Im over trying to figure out what he's thinking, and what he's doing with his time, and if he's moved on. Just so sick of it. Im moving on, to hell with it all, Im 20 once, I dont want to spend it overthinking stupid unworthy things.

So thats it Saudi guy. This is the end, good luck to you, and I hope that one day you will grow up and think outside the box. Im over it. Im over you.